Saturday, May 2, 2009


I had a birthday party. I didn't want to have it, but I planned it anyway and The BF kind of forced me to go through with it.

I plotted to hang myself in the bathroom while all my party guests were there. I didn't have any rope and I drank so much I blacked out. Then I told one of my friends my plan because I was so drunk I wasn't really thinking. She started to cry.

Then she left and The BF had to take care of me. He stole my pocket knife from me so I wouldn't cut myself, and I said I was going to hang myself anyway. He was upset and told me to get some help.

It's been a week and I haven't yet. I don't think I will. But you never know.

My perfect eloping plan has failed. The BF said he couldn't go through with it so I punched him and cried about it. Then I came to my senses and we arranged a compromise.

I picked out some rings online that I fancy to show The BF. Mostly Classic Solitaire Round Cuts. I told him if we can't elope my way he damn well better buy me the perfect engagement ring!

I hate weddings. I'm going to hate my own wedding. Weddings don't even mean anything you know? For example, my father was married 3 times and divorsed 3 times. My mother married my dad because she was knocked up. Seriously, if this is what I have to look forward to than fuck it!

My wedding will be small. 20 people tops. Immediate family only type thing. I've picked out my maid of honour and The BF picked out his best man. We shall be married by justice of the peace type deal in a forest somewhere. (Not my idea! I wanted to go to Australia!)

And it will be lovely. Fucking lovely marriage bliss!

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